Jamal Ahmelich

Jamal Ahmelich is a registered clinical counsellor through the BC Association of Clinical Counsellors. His philosophy of therapy is that the client/counsellor relationship is of utmost importance in promoting change and as such, always uses a client centered, strengths based approach.

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The holidays can be a stressful time of year for many. I sat down with the Squamish Chief to discuss some of the issues peoples face this time of year.

Q: For some, this time of year can be difficult. What are some ways to make it better?

A: Limiting social media, if that is a trigger. There is some research that shows life satisfaction decreases with increased use of social media.

Also, trying to plan holiday schedules so they are more manageable is helpful, too. Make sure you factor in “you” time. Also, be honest with yourself about what you can handle and be OK to say ‘no’ if you feel something is too much.

Q: With divorce, often one parent or the other is alone for part of the holidays. What advice do you have for people who find themselves alone at Christmas?

A: One of the big things is practicing gratitude or doing things that shift the focus away from yourself and into the community. For example, volunteering or getting out and connecting with friends. The Squamish Library has a great resource to help people find volunteer opportunities.

Be sure to practice self-care, too.

Q: There’s a lot of financial pressure at this time of year. What is your advice for tackling that stress?

A: Try to stick to a budget when it comes to gift giving. It doesn’t need to cost a lot of money. It really is the thought that counts. A lot of people forget that simple component.

Q: Obviously, some people don’t celebrate Christmas at all, but in our culture, we are bombarded with the holiday. What about those folks?

A: It is hard to avoid. At this time of year, too, there isn’t very much light. It can be more isolating at this time of year. Keep up with things that are important — getting into nature is a big one. Even just a five-minute walk can have such a positive impact on mood and energy. Keep up with exercise and social connections — go for a coffee with someone, for example.

Q: What about for kids? People expect this to be a happy time for them, but it isn’t necessarily a calm and peaceful time for all children.

A: Kids can feel the stress of adults, so, modeling self-care is important. Keeping kids in their routines is also important: where they are able to do the things they are supposed to be doing at a time when things are a bit chaotic with travel and going to see extended family.

Making sure they are getting enough sleep, definitely.

Q: What about if things do go off the rails? Say, Christmas dinner turns into a big fight, for example.

A: That is where letting go of expectations and just accepting things for what they are comes in. It is a stressful time for a lot of people so those kinds of things do happen.

Going back to that gratitude thing is such an important piece — you are together with the family and things can happen, but that might not be the case next year. Always remember that even though things happen, you are together.

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